Domestic violence is becoming more and more prevalent in our society, a broad definition would be; violent, abusive or intimidating behaviour in a relationship. The victims of domestic violence are in the majority of cases among the most vulnerable members of our society.
Domestic violence is cloaked in many forms, including emotional, sexual, social, financial, spiritual and physical abuse.
If you’re a victim of domestic violence, there are ways to get help, you don't have to be trapped in an abusive relationship.
The Domestic Violence Act of 1998 ("the Act") was promulgated to ensure that victims of domestic violence are protected from domestic abuse.
What is domestic violence?
The definition of “domestic violence” provided by the act is:
physical abuse;
sexual abuse;
emotional, verbal and psychological abuse;
economic abuse;
intimidation;
harassment:
stalking;
damage to property;
entry into the complainant’s residence without consent, where the parties do not share the same residence; or
any other controlling or abusive behaviour towards a complainant, where such conduct harms or may cause imminent harm to, the safety, health or wellbeing of the complainant;
It is, however, in many cases not always obvious that you’re in an abusive relationship. It can be common for someone who is being abused to believe that it’s their own fault and that they somehow ‘deserve’ the abuse. A relationship can be violent and abusive without physical violence. Here are some signs of emotional, verbal, psychological, economical abuse to look for:
Possessiveness:
They check on you all the time to see where you are, what you’re doing and who you’re with.
They try to control where you go and who you see, and get angry if you don’t do what they say.
They constantly send text messages and want to know what you are doing every moment of the day.
Jealousy:
They accuse you of being unfaithful or of flirting.
They isolate you from family and friends, often by behaving rudely to them.
Put-downs:
They put you down, either publicly or privately, by attacking your intelligence, appearance, opinions, mental health or capabilities.
They constantly compare you unfavourably to others.
They blame you for all the problems in your relationship, and for their violent outbursts.
They say things like, ‘No one else will want you.’
Threats:
They yell or sulk, and deliberately break things that you value.
They threaten to use violence against you, your family, friends or a pet.
Physical and sexual violence:
They push, shove, hit or grab you, or make you have sex or do things you don’t want to do.
They harm you, your family members or your pets.
Economical abuse:
Includes the unreasonable deprivation of economic or financial resources to which the victim is entitled under law or requires out of necessity.
Economic abuse may involve preventing a victim from resource acquisition, limiting the number of resources available to him/her, or exploiting the victim’s economic resources.
Obtaining a Protection Order
A protection order also called a restraining order or domestic violence interdict is a court order that tells an abuser to stop the abuse and sets certain conditions preventing the abuser from harassing or abusing the victim again. The protection order may include various other orders including but not limited:
help ensure that the abuser continues to pay rent or a bond or interim maintenance.
the protection order may also prevent the abuser from getting help from any other person to commit abusive acts.
Please feel free to contact Xander Naudé from Naude Attorneys if you require assistance in this regard - email: xander@naudelaw.com
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